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| Daily Disturbance Articles from our entertaining editorial team. |
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04-November-06, 10:50 PM
| #1 (permalink) |
| Sam-Hoe-rai N-Hoe-mad  Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Helena, MT
Posts: 5,976
    |  Mocking the Obsolete Okay, so what fun is it being a tech nerd if you can't mock people who can't keep up? As I'm running a mighty 1800+ (and will be until after the holidays... dangit), I fully accept any verbal thrashing... I should have built a new machine six months ago... I've just been lazy! Now then, TOP TEN WAYS TO MOCK SOMEONE WITH AN OLD COMPUTER! 1. Nice! Only takes twenty minutes to load Pac Man, right? 2. Wow, my Dad had a computer like this... I remember the day he brought it home in his brand, new Studebaker. 3. Neat, I've never seen a "Pong" console before. 4. I know your computer is a little older man, so I decided to give you some of my old games. Here's copies of "Gato", "Zork: The Underground Empire", "Depth Charge", "Consulting Eliza", and "King's Quest 1". 5. Didn't your computer used to be off white? I remember your yellow machine... now you have a black marble computer. Man, you really go through the... oh wait... it's the same computer. 6. Cool! Does the CD fit inside this black sleeve? Wait, why is it so soft? 5.25 what? 7. I didn't know they sold CGA monitors anymore! Oh... nevermind. 8. That's a massive paperweight ya got there. 9. Hey, this looks like my VCR from '85... I bet this thing could really wang chun back in it's day. 10. Push the button Frank!
__________________ “A good traveler has no fixed plans and is not intent on arriving.” - Lao Tzu |
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04-November-06, 10:58 PM
| #3 (permalink) | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| Review Pimp, but still Jo's Ho  Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Las Vegas, NV Most modded city in the world
Posts: 4,137
| Re: Mocking the Obsolete
I had one of those once.
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05-November-06, 12:11 AM
| #7 (permalink) |
| n00b-ass reviewer  Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Nirvana
Posts: 14,314
 | Re: Mocking the Obsolete Oh man. I remember when I offered parts to you for free but you said something to the effect that you were on the verge of an upgrade. An 1800? I guess the advantages are: You can get a lot of yard work accomplished while waiting for it to boot. You never have to worry about seizures from too many flashing colors. Black and white movies look quite natural. Instead of taking photos you can just play your home movies and watch as they pass by frame by frame. Peanut butter actually does still work as a thermal interface. You can make money doing guided tours on the history of computing. Your electricity bill is lower by using a bellows to cool the CPU. Sorry bro, I have a million more but must stop here.
__________________  "I'll stop being an A-Hole if you will stop being an Idiot." |
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05-November-06, 08:32 AM
| #11 (permalink) |
| Linux Warrior  Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: New "Ho"rleans
Posts: 632
  | I would try to say something funny, but my machine's older than his.... a Duron 1.3Ghz and the mobo has SDRAM and DDR slots. However, I have an excuse! I'm not running Windows. I don't need the latest hardware.
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05-November-06, 01:24 PM
| #12 (permalink) | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| Gridiron  Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Hovering over the Neg Rep Button
Posts: 3,640
 | Re: Mocking the Obsolete
Oh man, Im friggin rollin at that one, hahahahahahahaha. I aint one to talk thought I'm using a XP25 00 although itIS Oc'd !!!!!
__________________  The best activities for your health are pumping and humping." -Arnold Schwarzenegger Mongol General: "What is best in life?" Conan: "To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women." Only two people have every offered to die for you. One was Jesus Christ and the other is the American GI. One died for your soul, the other died for your freedom. | |||||||||||||||||||||||
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05-November-06, 03:53 PM
| #13 (permalink) | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| Sam-Hoe-rai N-Hoe-mad Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Helena, MT
Posts: 5,976
| Re: Mocking the Obsolete
I still have a turbo button on my old 586 (used to an 8088 back in the day). Old AT case that looks like a cinderblock. It might still be posted in the gallery. I think I remember mentioning it's massive 1.2 gigabyte harddrive, it's 40 megs of SIMMs EDO memory, it's quality 13.5 inch VGA monitor and it's kickin' 6x CD rom drive (that died). No USB, no PS/2 support... but ya got a good couple of serial ports! I think the last time the "turbo" worked was on an my old 386, if I remember right... that was a loooooong time ago! Still have the computer. It still runs, but the drivers are a real PITA. Win98 sorta runs on it... I miss playing Duke 3d on it though!
__________________ “A good traveler has no fixed plans and is not intent on arriving.” - Lao Tzu | |||||||||||||||||||||||
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05-November-06, 04:12 PM
| #14 (permalink) |
| Apex Master Tech  Join Date: May 2005 Location: UK
Posts: 401
| Re: Mocking the Obsolete I had a 120mhz 586 IBM chip (basicly a 486 upgrade chip) back in that day with 64mb of edo ram a 500mb OS drive and a 1gb scsi drive with an ISA controller oh and an awe64 with the additional ram and a 8mb diamond stealth VESA local bus graphics card. The one small problem was that the vesa local bus card didn't like the high FSB the 586 needed so to run it at full speed the monitor would only do 640x480 256colours and a refresh rate of 40HZ! (I used to have bad migranes  )
__________________ Supreme Borg Commander:  BORGS: 3400+ Sempron, 3200+ Athlon, 1.2Ghz Athlon |
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05-November-06, 04:57 PM
| #15 (permalink) |
| n00b-ass reviewer Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Nirvana
Posts: 14,314
| Re: Mocking the Obsolete I remember using 8 inch floppy disks. I also remember when I purchased a computer that had a 1GB drive and a CD-ROM, technology that was so cutting edge at the time that I had people coming over to the house just to gaze at it.
__________________ "I'll stop being an A-Hole if you will stop being an Idiot." |
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05-November-06, 06:05 PM
| #16 (permalink) |
| Apex Master Tech  Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Calgary Canada
Posts: 463
| Re: Mocking the Obsolete Life took on a whole new meaning whne I upgraded the video card to RGB in my first machine. Leisure Suit Larry in RGB color was almost too much for my prepubescent self to control!
__________________ chunkysoup How much soup could a soupachunk chunk if a soupachunk could chunk soup? |
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05-November-06, 08:40 PM
| #17 (permalink) |
| Apex Tech Fanatic Supreme  Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Harker Heights, TX
Posts: 656
| Re: Mocking the Obsolete 1800 huh? Not quite ready to step up to the abacus then. Don't worry some day when hair starts to grown in funny places you'll start to think about things like girls, and 64-bit cpus.
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