Just got home outta the rain. Main, I hate the rain lol.
We're supposed to go to Atlantic City tomorrow too and I think it's gonna rain up there. So I'll be broke and dripping wet...wonderful
So while I'm out rocking the penny machines...it's joke time! Enjoy

First one was submitted by a buddy of mine...

A man enters a bar and orders a drink. The bar has a robot bartender.
The robot serves him a perfectly prepared ****tail, and then asks him,
"What's your IQ?"
The man replies "150"
The robot proceeds to make conversation about global warming factors,
quantum physics and spirituality, bio-mimicry, environmental interconnectedness,
string theory, nano-technology, and sexual proclivities

The customer is very impressed and thinks, "This is really cool."
He decides to test the robot. He walks out of the bar, turns around,
and comes back in for another drink. Again, the robot serves him the
perfectly prepared drink and asks him, "What's your IQ?"
The man responds, "About 100."
Immediately the robot starts talking, but this time, about football,
NASCAR, baseball, super models, favorite fast foods, guns, and women's breasts.
Really impressed, the man leaves the bar and decides to give the
robot one more test. He heads out and returns, the robot serves him and asks,
"What's your IQ?"
The man replies, "ER, 50, I think."
And the robot says... real slowly...

"So............... ya gonna vote for Bush again?"

lol

A man walks into a bar and asks for a beer. "Certainly, sir," says the bartender. "That'll be one cent." "One penny?!" exclaims the guy. "ThatÂ’s right."
So the guy glances at the menu and asks, "Could I have a nice juicy T-bone steak, with fries, peas and a salad?""Certainly, sir," replies the bartender. "ThatÂ’ll be four cents." "Four cents?" says the guy.
"Jeez, IÂ’d like to meet the guy who owns this place!" "HeÂ’s upstairs with my wife," says the bartender. "What's he doing with your wife?" asks the guy. "Same as what I'm doing to his business."

And last one...
A redneck goes to a pharmacist and says: "I got a hot date tonight, an' I need me some pertection. How much is a pack a' dem rubbers gonna cost me?"
The pharmacist responds: "A three-pack of condoms is $4.99 with tax."
To which the redneck replies: "TACKS! Gawd a' mighty, don't they stay on by themselves."

Alright guys I'm outta here! Hope some where out there it'll be nice outside...looks like it's gonna be pouring down here all throughout the weekend. At least I won't have to mow the lawn for a few days
Have a great weekend guys, peace out

Flasher

There were three little old ladies sitting on a park bench having a quiet conversation when a flasher approached from across the park. The flasher came up to the ladies, stood right in front of them and opened his trench coat.

The first lady immediately had a stroke.

Then the second lady also had a stroke.

But the third lady, being older and more feeble, couldn't reach that far.
__________________________________________________ _____________________
Young man asked an old rich man how he made his money.

The old guy fingered his worsted wool vest and said, "Well, son, it was 1932. The depth of the Great Depression. I was down to my last nickel."

"I invested that nickel in an apple. I spent the entire day polishing the apple and, at the end of the day, I sold the apple for ten cents."

"The next morning, I invested those ten cents in two apples. I spent the entire day polishing them and sold them at 5:00 pm for 20 cents. I continued this system for a month, by the end of which I'd accumulated a fortune of $1.37."

"Then my wife's father died and left us two million dollars."

Thanks for the jokes bro!

...man, we just got back from Atlantic City about an hour ago. Rainy as hell lol.

Went to bed around 4am saturday morning, woke up about 6:30 saturday morning...let me tell ya, that was the suck

It rained here off and on but lil shower today, Good jokes.

No showers at all today, beautiful day overall

Quote: Originally Posted by IronSerif A man walks into a bar and asks for a beer. "Certainly, sir," says the bartender. "That'll be one cent." "One penny?!" exclaims the guy. "That’s right." So the guy glances at the menu and asks, "Could I have a nice juicy T-bone steak, with fries, peas and a salad?""Certainly, sir," replies the bartender. "That’ll be four cents." "Four cents?" says the guy. "Jeez, I’d like to meet the guy who owns this place!" "He’s upstairs with my wife," says the bartender. "What's he doing with your wife?" asks the guy. "Same as what I'm doing to his business."

i so read this joke on ebaumsworld lol. definately worth sharing though. Especialy since here at places like school you cant access sites like ebaums.

yep, I heard a longer, different version of that joke too about a year ago. But usually when my friends take take the time to send stuff over to me I'll definitely find room to post it

[Can a admin or mod remove this posted in the wrong thread.

Sorry

THANKS

-CUBAN

Can a admin or mod remove this posted in the wrong thread.

Sorry

THANKS

-CUBAN