Finally Friday! This week actually seemed to fly by pretty quick...so no complaints on my end But the lightning has started and I'ma guessin' that the rain is sure to follow...blah...just get rid of this hot weather hah

So anyways I hope everyones week has been goin good so far...busy as usual I'm sure! And on that note...Joke time! Enjoy


Got this joke in an email from a friend..thanks!



A man and his wife were working in their garden on day and the man looks
over at his wife and says:

"Your butt is getting really big, I mean really big. I bet your butt is
bigger than the barbecue"

With that he proceeded to get a measuring tape and measures the grill and
then went over to where his wife was working and measures his wife's
bottom.

"Yes, I was right; your butt is two inches wider than the barbecue!!!" THe
woman chose to ignore her husband.

Later that night in bed, the husband is feeling a little frisky. He makes
some advances toward his wife who completely brushes him off.

"What's wrong?" he asks

She answeres: "Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-ass grill
for one little weenie?"

This last one is pretty good, but it might take a few seconds to sink in...

A man went to the doctor's office to get a double dose of viagra.
The doctor told him that he couldn't allow him a double dose.
"Why not?" asked the man.
"Because it's not safe," replied the doctor.
"But I need it really bad," said the man.
"Well, why do you need it so badly?" asked the doctor.

The man said, "My girlfriend is coming into town on Friday; my ex-wife
will be here on Saturday; and my
wife is coming home on Sunday. Can't you see? I must have a double dose."
The doctor finally relented saying, "Okay, I'll give it to you, but you
have to come in on Monday morning
so that I can check you to see if there are any side effects."
On Monday, the man dragged himself in; his arm in a sling.
The doctor asked, "What happened to you?"
The man said, "No one showed up!"


Alright crew I'm outta here! Hopefully you guys got something fun lined up for the weekend. I might need to go on eBay real quick and make a post for a Devil's Reject's Promo poster, patch, and matches that a friend of mine got when she saw the movie. fun fun fun
Take it easy guys!

LOL, that second one is TOO FUNNY

And one from yours truly:

The janitor was sweeping up the church one day, when the priest motioned to him from the confessional.

"Hey, sit in here for a minute. I need to use the bathroom."

"Oh, Father...I wouldn't know what to do."

"Don't worry about it. I'll be really quick, but in case someone does show up, there's a list of sins and the appropriate Hail Maries taped to the wall."

No sooner had the priest left, a woman's voice said, "Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. I had sex with a married man!"

The janitor scans the list of sins and finds Adultery. "Ok, say 5 Hail Maries and your sins will be forgiven."

"But it was anal sex," said the woman.

The janitor checks the list again, but doesn't find what he's looking for. Quickly, he looks out and sees a chior boy.

"Psssst...hey, what does the Father usually give for anal sex??"

The boy shrugs. "I dunno...a candy bar and a coke?"

heh..a little dirty--but not bad....

One day a young man and woman were in their bedroom making love. All of a sudden a bumble bee entered the bedroom window. As the young lady parted her legs the bee entered her vagina. The woman started screaming "Oh my god, help me, there's a bee in my vagina!" The husband immediately took her to the local doctor and explained the situation. The doctor thought for a moment and said "Hmm, tricky situation. But I have a solution to the problem if young sir would permit." The husband being very concerned agreed that the doctor could use whatever method to get the bee out of his wife's vagina. The doctor said "OK, what I'm gonna do is rub some honey over the top of my penis and insert it into your wife's vagina. When I feel the bee getting closer to the tip of my penis I shall withdraw it and the bee should hopefully follow my penis out of your wife's vagina. The husband nodded and gave his approval. The young lady said "Yes, Yes, whatever, just get on with it." So the doctor, after covering the tip of his penis with honey, inserted it into the young lady's vagina. After a few gentle strokes, the doctor said, "I don't think the bee has noticed the honey yet. Perhaps I should go a bit deeper." So the doctor went deeper and deeper. After a while the doctor began shafting the young lady very hard indeed. The young lady began to quiver with excitement. She began to moan and groan aloud. The doctor, concentrating very hard, looked like he was enjoying himself, he then put his hands on the young lady's breasts and started making loud noises. The husband at this point suddenly became very annoyed and shouted, "Now wait a minute! What the Hell do you think you're doing?" The doctor, still concentrating, replied, "Change of plan. I'm gonna drown the bastard!"

and another....breat stroke race....

A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are in a breast stroke race. The starter's gun goes off and the three girls dive into the pool. The brunette and the redhead shoot across the pool and get out. 20 minutes later the blonde reaches the end and gets out. The judge says, "The gold medal goes to the brunette, the silver medal goes to the redhead, and the bronze goes to the blonde." The blonde says, "I don't want to be a sore loser, but I think the other girls were using their arms."

lol great jokes u guys, thanks

You guys are all PERVS!

Got anymore?