Yep... it's time for another round of cruelty to newbies... or just the ignorant and trusting... or those idiots who keep asking you to do crap that takes time away from YOUR life.

ANOTHER ROUND OF N00B SLAMMING ACTION:

NOTE: Once again... I do NOT take responsibility for those poor, benighted n00bs protesting on your lawn, howling for your blood...

1. Did you know that if you take that fan off that big block (the heatsink) on your motherboard, it'll make it nice and quiet? Don't worry about it, it's just extra crap they put in anyway... it's just a safety precaution!

2. Of course you can install any kind of RAM into your computer... Duh! Some just run faster... if it doesn't seem to fit in the slot, push really hard, it'll slide into place!

3. There's a red light on your optical mouse? Uh-oh... that means there's an error... did you hook it up right?

4. What brand of computer would I buy If I were you? I'd buy an E-Machine with a Celeron processor! They're so powerful! That "E" stands for "Extreme"!

5. Look, your problem is with Intel (make sure to mutter the: "ligence" part). You have a really bad error based off a missing portion of your Intel(ligence: again muttered) processing, I'd suggest loading up DOS 6.22. It the only way you're going to learn to handle these errors (muttered: and learn to stop calling me).

6. I just read that "Cybersex" is making a comeback... I don't know how that fetish ever got started... I mean, makin' it with your computer is SO messy... it's not good for the drives either!

7. Want to buy my old computer? Unlike yours, mine actually still runs some stuff...

8. There's smoke coming out of your monitor? No big deal, it's just burning itself in. If it catches fire, just put it out and wait a couple minutes... it should be fine... yeah, that's pretty normal.

9. You have a general failure?!? Oh my GOD! you have a shielding breach! Get to a safe place, and for God's sake, DON'T turn the machine back on! Make sure to wrap it in tinfoil before the computer repair guy shows up... it'll cut down on the radiation leaking into your house!

10. What... you got a memory address error? It's okay, the machine is just getting older. That happens... When it starts screwing everything up, and doesn't remember your user ID, take it out back and shoot it.

AHAHAHAHAH! Oh mna thats some good shizit

Your power supply blew up?
Open it and look for a fuse.
If it's blown, take it out, wrap it with tin foil, and put it back in.
BTW, I once told my friend Jonathan Reider that my GF(a MX 420) has a core temperature of 105F, he said ,"Oh my gosh! You're roasting your poor GF!"
I now know that he is a n00b.

your girlfriend is an MX 420? damn.. i though I was a geek

Quote: Originally posted by Darksamurai 10. What... you got a memory address error? It's okay, the machine is just getting older. That happens... When it starts screwing everything up, and doesn't remember your user ID, take it out back and shoot it.

ROFL funny shiznet man

,,

Quote: Originally posted by Miststlkr your girlfriend is an MX 420? damn.. i though I was a geek

Ha!
At least he can trade her in for a higher performance model without the messy break-up!

o damn thats cold man

Yeah, that was pretty bad...