Quote: Originally Posted by The Register Academics at the Washington University School of Medicine in St. Louis revealed their shock findings yesterday after extensive research. It seems that the shrinks were easily able to demonstrate a connection between heavy drinking (according to their definition of heavy drinking) and unhealthily large amounts of nookie (according to their hastily-revised personal definition thereof). "To my knowledge, most research in young adults has used a standard of 'up to six' sex partners when examining risk," said Patricia Cavazos-Rehg, PhD. "But the average number of partners for the people in this study was 9.26." Hastily making the unilateral decision that ten or more partners now constitutes "high risk", the psych doc and her envious crew ploughed on. Sadly, the po-faced psychs seemed unaware of the feelgood implications of their research, seeking to imply that anyone scoring above one or two was some kind of diseased orgiastic slut. "The more sex partners you have, the more likely you'll encounter someone with an STD," said Cavazos-Rehg, further burnishing her already dazzling credentials in the bleeding-obvious area of human knowledge. "Chances also increase for unintended pregnancies and other health complications," she added, thus - to her own satisfaction - proving that a "high" number of sexual partners is a bad thing. (You just knew this study wasn't going to say anything like "Hey, well done young people! You're getting more action than I ever did! Props!") Apparently the researchers conducted "personal" interviews with 601 youngsters aged 18-25. To give the research the necessary doleful slant, all 601 were chosen from among relatives of known alcoholics. They concluded that "alcohol-dependent individuals... are at risk for increased number of sexual partners (ten or more)." ("At risk"?) This research does seem to tell us one thing with certainty. If you're a grad student on the psych faculty at Washington University, you don't admit to having had more than five sexual partners. In fact, this kind of "research" seems to fall more under the heading of "subjective morality" or even "jealousy" than anything else. Also, based on their notion of what constitutes a "high" number of sexual partners, we're guessing that the Washington U crowd will file you under 'alcohol-dependent' as soon as you order your second half of mild. Meanwhile, for all the normal people, you heard it here first: drinking will get you laid.

Well, Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh! Why do you think there's alcohol at parties?

Hey! Did you know that the sky is blue!

They used the word nookie, in a research study article, that reminds me of limp bizkit...ROFLMAO

I guess the research that we all had previously considered "serious", like a cure for cancer, Parkinson's, Alzheimer's, and many others has fallen under the heading of "Quack Medicine"... I bet their Mommies and Daddies are so proud that they put all that time, effort, and money into a medical education, just so they could come up with a gem of a conclusion like that...

Reminds me of Bruce Willis in the original Die Hard, getting attitude from the dispatch operator...

"Attention, whoever you are, this channel is restricted for police and emergency calls only!"

"No [CENSORED] [CENSORED] lady, do I sound like I'm ordering a PIZZA???"

Drinking has never gotten me laid and I can drink a few of my friends under the table. Wouldn't call myself an alcoholic by any stretch of the imagination but I can most certainly hold my own.

Quote: Originally Posted by j-dogg Drinking has never gotten me laid and I can drink a few of my friends under the table. Wouldn't call myself an alcoholic by any stretch of the imagination but I can most certainly hold my own.

The trick is to get the women drunk. You need to have women at the party to get them drunk. So stop having sausage fest parties where you and yer friends just drink til you're faded, and get a woman drunk til she's faded and get back to us with an updated report.

Quote: Originally Posted by Iateronmly The trick is to get the women drunk. You need to have women at the party to get them drunk. So stop having sausage fest parties where you and yer friends just drink til you're faded, and get a woman drunk til she's faded and get back to us with an updated report.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAHAAA

*gasp*

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHahahahahaa

Wish I woulda had this info 8 kids and a few thousand gallons of alcohol ago I would have quit drinkin and boinkin' long ago..........................











Ok , thats a bold faced LIE !!!!! I'll always drink & boink , Im not a quiter

Can i have this guys degree?? pleeaaaasssssseeeee watch this i can count to three 123.

When guys drink a lot most girls look pretty d@mn good, same goes for girls about us too.

p.s. Just make sure u leave and don't wake up w/ her otherwise that mega hotty u scored w/ turns into a cow w/ warts.

Well now this is the thing, I have drank myself to the point I don't remember anything that happened 10 minutes prior, and yet none of the women seem more attractive.

Besides drunk women are damaged goods, and wayyy too easy. Tagging drunk broads is like 100-0 in CS against all bots, a good personal achievement but nothing you would be proud to tell your friends.

Kinda sad what today's youth are achieving. "But the average number of partners for the people in this study was 9.26." Come on kids, wrap it up and get that average above 10!

E

Quote: Originally Posted by j-dogg Besides drunk women are damaged goods, and wayyy too easy. Tagging drunk broads is like 100-0 in CS against all bots, a good personal achievement but nothing you would be proud to tell your friends.

That my friend, is why lies were created....