I hope everyone had a greaet Halloween! We sure did, I just hope and pray that no pictures of us in our costumes appear anywhere on the Internet (although it is inevitable).

Also...Happy 21st birthday to one of my closest friends!!!

Anyways I'm completely drained...so on to the funnies!

Enjoy

Yes...Halloween is over....but we should dedicate one more post to it!

So first...click here to visit another crazy/extreme pumpkin carving site with a gallery. Can't go wrong with the yoda pumkin


And now, some Halloween rules (keep these in mind for next year!):


=> When it appears that you have killed the monster, *never* check to see if it's really dead.

=> Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, even as a joke.

=> Do not search the basement, especially if the power has just gone out.

=> If your children speak to you in Latin or any other language which they should not know, or if they speak to you using a voice which is other than their own, shoot them immediately. It will save you a lot of grief in the long run. NOTE: It will probably take several rounds to kill them, so be prepared.

=> When you have the benefit of numbers, *never* pair off and go it alone.

=> As a general rule, don't solve puzzles that open portals to Hell.

=> Never stand in, on, above, below, beside, or anywhere near a grave, tomb, crypt, mausoleum, or other house of the dead.

=> If you're searching for something which caused a noise and find out that it's just the cat, *leave the room immediately if you value your life.*

=> If appliances start operating by themselves, move out.

=> Do not take *anything* from the dead.

=> If you find a town which looks deserted, it's probably for a reason. Take the hint and stay away.

=> Don't fool with recombinant DNA technology unless you're sure you know what you are doing.

=> If you're running from the monster, expect to trip or fall down at least twice, more if you are of the female persuasion. Also note that, despite the fact that you are running and the monster is merely shambling along, it's still moving fast enough to catch up with you.

=> If your companions suddenly begin to exhibit uncharacteristic behavior such as hissing, fascination for blood, glowing eyes, increasing hairiness, and so on, get away from them as fast as possible.

=> Stay away from certain geographical locations, some of which are listed here: Amityville, Elm Street, Transylvania, Nilbog (you're in trouble if you recognize this one), the Bermuda Triangle, or any small town in Maine.

=> If your car runs out of gas at night, do not go to the nearby deserted-looking house to phone for help.

=> Beware of strangers bearing tools such as chainsaws, staple guns, hedge trimmers, electric carving knives, combines, lawnmowers, butane torches, soldering irons, band saws, or any device made from deceased companions.



And then last...


Other Numbers of the Beast

1010011010 - Binary of the Beast

6, uh... what was that number again? - Number of the Blonde Beast

1 (666) - Area code of the Beast

$665.95 - Retail price of the Beast

$699.25 - Price of the Beast plus 5% state sales tax

$769.95 - Price of the Beast with all accessories and replacement soul

Phillips 666 - Gasoline of the Beast

666k - Retirement plan of the Beast

666 mg - Recommended Minimum Daily Requirement of Beast

Word 6.66 - Word Processor of the Beast

665.9997856 - The Number of the Beast on a Pentium

Check out this lil advertisement clip from another country. Looks like a vodafone advertisement? I love it when I can't understand these ads...but they're still funny as anything for some odd reason.

Tune is kinda catchy if you ask me...I'm gonna start doing that with my phone...

Might as well keep the short movie clips going!

If there has been one method for decision making that has proven its reliability and accuracy time after time again...

It has to be the Rock, Paper, and Scissors method!

Now view a clip of some hard core players...

If I had to choose something that I enjoyed more than creative beer commercials...it would have to be stick figure animation! I don't think you can go wrong with them in anyway!

If you love them as much as I do...then check out A Max Payne Stick Figure Animation! I need to start my bar entrances like that...

Watch out, has some language in it....

We're gonna go from one extreme to the other here. For those of you who do not enjoy all that wonderful, sweet, precious action...here is something on the softer side.

Here is some flash stuff about a dog named Pavlov. He's placed in these experiments of sorts. I really can't explain it. He basically hits this red button in a big'ol white room and stuff happens lol!


It would have been better if he had some guns with a few dramatic moments...

This has gotta be one of the greatest things to give to one of your friends...other than the plastic chicken that lays eggs!

This is a lil stuffed dog that humps your leg!

This would keep at least 8 people I know entertained for an hour.

Also...this site has some other great gadgets/toys that are worth taking a look at. If you guys find something interesting, definitely post it

I think it's time we throw a game in here!

This is sort of like a backwards tetris? I think?

Just don't be like me and wait a good 5 mins to realize that nothing is going to fall from the top I blame it on the Bacardi

Time to play Crash Down!

There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer.

When asked to define great, he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!"

He now works for Microsoft writing error messages.

I think we should end tonights funnies on an educational note.

What are we gonna learn tonight?

Where your poop goes!

What a journey!

Quote: Originally posted by IronSerif Check out this lil advertisement clip from another country. Looks like a vodafone advertisement? I love it when I can't understand these ads...but they're still funny as anything for some odd reason. Tune is kinda catchy if you ask me...I'm gonna start doing that with my phone...

It's an Icelandic telecommuncations company. Ohh god I need a life....

Small town in Maine...
here's a hint from somebody in Maine

Don't come here it's all small towns.

So...who still wants an H2?

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Have you ever spoken and wished that you could take the words back or you
could crawl into a hole? Here are a few stories of people who did and do....


1) I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and
asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I
turned around and walked back out and never went back. My husband didn't say
a word ... he knew better.


2) I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was
unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for several
minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at
the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him
and said, "I think I like playing with men's balls."


3) My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a
variety of nuts. As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the
counter asked if we needed any help. I replied, "No, I'm just looking at
your nuts." My sister started to laugh hysterically, the boy grinned, and I
turned beet-red and walked away. To this day, my sister has never let me
forget.


4) While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release
some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her
after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I told
her that if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be punished. To
my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening,
"If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you
kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!" The silence was deafening after this
enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing. I
mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my
daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me were
screams of laughter.


5) A lady picked up several items at a discount store. When she finally got
up to the checker, she learned that one of her items had no price tag.
Imagine her embarrassment when the checker got on the intercom and boomed
out for all the store to hear, "PRICE CHECK ON LANE THIRTEEN, TAMPAX SUPER
SIZE." That was bad enough, but somebody at the rear of the store apparently
misunderstood the word "Tampax" for "THUMBTACKS." In a business-like tone, a
voice boomed back over the intercom. "DO YOU WANT THE KIND YOU PUSH IN WITH
YOUR THUMB OR THE KIND YOU POUND IN WITH A HAMMER?"


6) Have you ever asked your child a question too many times? My
three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was on
him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch in between
errands. It was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco,
I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my seven-month-old
daughter, and she was clean. Then I realized that Danny had not asked to go
potty in a while, so I asked him if he needed to go, and he said "No." I
kept thinking, "Oh Lord, that child has had an accident, and I don't have
any clothes with me." Then I said, "Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an
accident?" "No," he replied. I just KNEW that he ! must have had an
accident, because the smell was getting worse. Soooooo! I asked one more
time, "Danny, did you have an accident?" This time he jumped up, yanked down
his pants, bent over and spread his cheeks and yelled. "SEE MOM, IT'S JUST
FARTS!!" While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing, he
calmly pulled up his pants and sat down. An old couple made me feel better
by thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!


7) This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very
embarrassed female news anchor woman who will, in the future, likely think
before she speaks. What happens when you predict snow but don't get any....a
true story... We had a female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed
to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked: "So Bob,
where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?" Not only did HE have to
leave the set, but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard

If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?

and my favorite:

If we find life on Mars, will it taste like chicken?

Big props goes out to Lord Dragon for this one. Thanks bro

YOU KNOW YOU WERE A TEENAGER IN THE 90'S WHEN...

- You knew who Leonardo, Michaelangelo, Raphael and Donatello were.

- You remember the Milli Vanilli scandal.

- You religiously watched 90210, Melrose Place and Twin Peaks.

- You tight-rolled your jeans.

- You wore big hoop earrings.

- You wore virgin bangles (Madonna bangles).

- You thought bellbottoms were horrible and couldn't understand why anyone would've ever worn them.

- Clogs and scrunchies were in.

- You knew how to do the MC Hammer dance and the running man.

- You owned a pair of Apple Pies, Air JordanÂ’s, Nike AirÂ’s, or Reeboks Pumps.

- You thought "Ice Ice Baby" was the coolest song ever.

- Your fringe was at least 4 inches high, and you thought it looked good.

- You tried to sing along to "Informer", no matter how hard it was.
- A hairdryer and/or Gel was required to set your hair.

- You rolled up the sleeves of your t-shirts, and tucked in the front, letting the back hang out.

- You wore 2 pairs of neon coloured socks

- You wore overalls with only one side connected.

- You had Exclamation or Taboo perfume.

- You remember cartoons like Mask, Thundercats, Maya the bee, She-ra and He-man.

- You had a "slap band" or a pop swatch.

- You wore your sweat pants pulled up to your knees.

- You had a black Debbie Gibson hat.

- You wanted to be just like Paula Abdul.

- You owned the Spin Doctors tape.

- You said, "PSYCH" or "WAY!"

- You saw "Wayne's World" at least 2 times at the cinema.

- You loved the New Kids on the Block and Bros.

- 21 Jump street and Booker.

- You wore jeans pulled up to your navel.

- All of your clothes were "baggy".

- You wore Kepper or stussy.

- You owned a pair of bike shorts, possibly ones with a neon strip down the side.

- You had a boom box, or your stereo was a weird colour like pink or aqua blue.

- You bought tapes or vinyl.

- You never missed the fresh prince or Degrassi junior high.

- You remember when TLC weren't divas, and they dressed like they were in the circus.

- You thought "I'm Too Sexy" was such a cool song.

- You "busted a move" when C&C Music Factory was playing.

- You remember when Mark Wahlberg was part of Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch.

- You owned a silk shirt, which you tucked into your jeans.

- You wore your socks over your tracksuit pants.

- You had jeans in various colours, like green, brown, burgundy and black.

- You had a Greeks/Italians/Serbs/Lebs do it better T-shirt.

- You were addicted to Nintendo.

- You gave the "peace" sign all the time.

- If you were a guy, you had an "undercut" and you parted it down the middle.

- You had a pair of Dr Martens

- You owned at least one Hyper-colour shirt.