Yep... It's time to kick-off the newest format for DarkSamurai's Dojo. Not big changes, but I'm doin' some small stuff that'll hopefully catch on.

PLEASE NOTE!!!!!!!!!!!! Any references to illegal or sexual activities are only in your head. For SHAME!

TERM OF THE DAY: (yes, a new feature to the Dojo!)

DRA: Data Recovery Agent. An XP network Admin who can access Encrypted File System data/ public key encrypted files without a user's private key.

Translation: A guy who can decrypt the files that dumb n00bs lose their keys to access (or split with when they get canned).


WELCOME TO MR. SAMURAI'S NEIGHBORHOOD!

Hi kids, welcome to Mr. Samurai's neighborhood!

For those of you new to Mr. Samurai's Neighborhood, Mr. Samurai is actively working on educating the masses with information that is considered potentially dangerous! All in an overly arrogant and superior tone that he plans on using when he conquers the world!

Let me put it this way boys and girls... If you ain't got l337 skillz, go find some other script-kiddy to play with. Yeah, that's right. Put that Cheesebox back in your bag and go cry to your Mommy!

Now then! Today, we'll be discussing how to some places to obtain hacking programs, a little bit on phone phreaking and how to seriously piss off "The Man"... but first, a word from our sponsor!!!

Today's Sponser: PIMPBURGER! Remember kids, If you don't like to beat yo' meat, hit the streets and get somethin' sweet for cheap! Available now, at Pimpburger!

Pimpburger, on a street-corner near you!"

Additional funding provided by BlackDeath TV Dinners... if it was good enough for midieval Europe, it's good enough for you!

Now, back to the show!

Hi, and welcome back to Mr. Samurai's Neighborhood. As mentioned before the break, we'll discuss how to do some basic hacking utilities, phone-freaking and how to construct a "Blato Box" (which will effectively make the Feds, the FCC and the neighborhood your working in, scream for your blood).

Now then, when searching for hacking utilities, you'll need to search for them by name. Best way to do this is to pick up a copy of "Hacking Exposed" and let them tell you all the evil things you shouldn't be playing with. Continuing on, let's talk about how to crack passwords...

(CENSORED FOR CONTENT... Blame the Bush administration!)

Phone Phreaking isn't hard, in today's lecture, I'll teach you how to capture Cell-Phone numbers so you can call far-off lands for free...

(CENSORED FOR CONTENT! Blame the FCC! Go to "cute_and_fuzzy_bunnies.com" and forget you were ever here!)

Building a Blato-box is a little more complicated. I'll walk you through it. You'll need to schedule a trip to "Radio Shack" for some parts and see if you can find a gasoline generator. Now then, let's go ahead and put up some of these blueprints...

(CENSORED FOR CONTENT...Freedom of information act my ass!)

Now then, that wasn't too hard, was it kids? Next week, I'll show you how to pirate cable using a circut board, a couple resistors and a screwdriver, build explosive devices from household chemicals, change your (and other people's) police record, and how to give yourself a well-deserved Harvard degree in about twenty minutes! Tune in next week (If they don't find where I'm broadcasting from!!!)

Well kids, thats all the time we have today. So let's sing a song...

"It's a beautiful day in the cyberhood... a beatiful day to frag your neighbor. So would you hack my, could you hack my, IRS statement... goodnight kids!"

NOTES A PLENTY: I do not in any way, shape or form condone hacking, phone phreaking, killing off phone services in a given area (dude, no phone lines mean no internet, and that's just CRUEL!), or anything else that could get you busted and have the men in blue at MY door when you rat me out!

ALSO NOTE: Nothing said above should be cause for you to go out and do somethin' dumb like actually try to do any of this crap. I've known people picked up by the authorities for everything from burning unlimited channel Satellite cards to hacking (and others who were expelled from school for hacking their grades). If you're curious, practice hackin' your own network... it's safer and they can't arrest you for it! If you get good and think you wanna try something else, think about the movie "Office Space"... who the hell wants to go to a "Pound you in the ass prison!

A SERIOUS NOTE: All due respect for Mr. Rogers... whom had been a great kid's show host since I was a little samurai!

Freedom of Information act my ass... great stuff.

never shy on humor... welcome back great warrior!!!