King of the dumb n00bs!

Darksamurai · 15-April-04, 07:31 PM

Had a guy come up to me today...

Customer: "I need to buy an AGP port. Do you guys sell them?"
Me: "Uhh, actually they come as part of your motherboard."
Customer: "So you don't sell them seperately." (edge in his voice now)
Me: "They have to be on your motherboard. It has to do with the bus speed, and how it transmits data, you're not going to find it externally. It has to be on your motherboard."
Customer: "Well, I'm going to go get someone to put one on my motherboard. I'll find someone who knows how to do it (now he sounds pissed for some reason)
Me: *Mocking laughter*

DuplexEmotions · 15-April-04, 07:33 PM

Ha!
Worst I had was a woman asking me how fast the lone monitor sitting on the desk was.
Me: "That's a monitor. I can hook up a computer to it, though, and you can see how fast it is."
Her: "Okay!"
She ended up buying the thing.

j-dogg · 15-April-04, 07:37 PM

How about the guy in Circuit City who told me Kingston HyperX isn't compatible with the Duron processor

ion · 15-April-04, 07:38 PM

I worked on a womans PC who had the thing plugged into 5 surge supressors, sequentially. I didn't ask why though.

DuplexEmotions · 15-April-04, 07:38 PM

I once spent close to an hour trying to explain to somebody that the old GeoBook running GeOS is not running Windows 98.

Lunamods · 15-April-04, 07:56 PM

I always used to get people that when you ask what the specs of their machine are they would say, "Its a Windows 98 computer",then you ask em what proc/speed, "It a Windows 98" then you ask em how much memory, "Its a 20giga bytes memory".

Then they want to trade it in for a "Windows XP computer" cause they heard they were faster,then you tell em what you can build them a new system for including 256 mega bytes of memory,have to say memory not RAM, and they say "Forget that, my Windows 98 computer has 20 Gigabytes,come on honey lets go to the other place their way over priced here"

Highperf15 · 15-April-04, 07:56 PM

I hope those people have other attrubutes going for them........if not......

"QUIT USING UP EVERYBODY ELSES OXYGEN!!!!!!!"

BigAkita · 15-April-04, 08:01 PM

Had a lady who's monitor died. I found a good one for a cheap price. When it came in she asked if it already had all the little pictures loaded in it.

DuplexEmotions · 15-April-04, 08:09 PM

I always thought it was funny when the customers tested how fast a computer was by waving the mouse on the desktop, then went 'yeah, it's good'

Highperf15 · 15-April-04, 08:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BigAkita


	Had a lady who's monitor died. I found a good one for a cheap price. When it came in she asked if it already had all the little pictures loaded in it.

"OMG"..........

TekXoID · 15-April-04, 08:09 PM

lmao, if you think that's bad...

I need to get a CPU for my son, what colors do you carry?
Do you mean the actual case?
Yes, the CPU
Erm...We carry the Antec and Lian-Li's on show up front.
I said the CPU not the hard drive.
I think you mean the computer enclosure, which do you like?
How long have you worked here?
I founded this store Mam, if you do not trust my expertise you can go elsewhere for your computer needs.
*murmur* I knew HP was better than these local idiots.
Get out.

Gamma_Goblin · 15-April-04, 08:15 PM

wow, pictures in the monitor and multi colored CPUs.... I don't think I've ever dealed with that bad of idiots! I guess it is a good thing I don't have a retail store for the customers would be beat for their stupidity

j-dogg · 15-April-04, 08:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TekXoID


	lmao, if you think that's bad... I need to get a CPU for my son, what colors do you carry? Do you mean the actual case? Yes, the CPU Erm...We carry the Antec and Lian-Li's on show up front. I said the CPU not the hard drive. I think you mean the computer enclosure, which do you like? How long have you worked here? I founded this store Mam, if you do not trust my expertise you can go elsewhere for your computer needs. murmur I knew HP was better than these local idiots. Get out.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

godfoot · 15-April-04, 08:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Darksamurai


	Had a guy come up to me today... Customer: "I need to buy an AGP port. Do you guys sell them?" Me: "Uhh, actually they come as part of your motherboard." Customer: "So you don't sell them seperately." (edge in his voice now) Me: "They have to be on your motherboard. It has to do with the bus speed, and how it transmits data, you're not going to find it externally. It has to be on your motherboard." Customer: "Well, I'm going to go get someone to put one on my motherboard. I'll find someone who knows how to do it (now he sounds pissed for some reason) Me: Mocking laughter

Sounds like a job for the ......... (insert dramatic music here)........ UNACLOCKERÃ‚Â®!!!

davidkruta · 15-April-04, 08:42 PM

school principal's letter: It has come to our attention that 2 blue hard drives were taken recently. [insert bearacratic bs here]
*go to check hard drives, theyre all there* (lacie externals)
umm, all the hard drives are here.
principal: *points over where 2 entire computers used to sit* "those 2 hard drives are gone"
me: you mean computers right?
principal: no the hard drives, someone just threw them in their bag and took them.
me: *shakes head*

Spectrum · 15-April-04, 08:50 PM

i build a nice old a lady a computer, and she put the mouse on the monitor to move it around. i also remember i was putting groceries in a ladies car and saw an emachines. i asked her about it and she said she was getting emails about penis enlargment, and she had the hard drive replaced and 128mb of "memory" added, but they kept coming, so she bought a new computer. wtf?

godfoot · 15-April-04, 08:54 PM

I can already envision the tech support stories coming here....PJ....DS....??

lokies_mom · 15-April-04, 08:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BigAkita


	Had a lady who's monitor died. I found a good one for a cheap price. When it came in she asked if it already had all the little pictures loaded in it.

WELL, did it ?

DuplexEmotions · 15-April-04, 08:55 PM

someone brought in a 400mhz computer with Windows XP on it with all the 'fixins' turned on. They were wondering why it was so slow.

davidkruta · 15-April-04, 08:59 PM

haha wow some of these stories are outrageous. its like prank calling dell saying that youre cup holder is broken, but these people are serious.

15-April-04, 07:31 PM		#1 (permalink)
Darksamurai Sam-Hoe-rai N-Hoe-mad	King of the dumb n00bs! Had a guy come up to me today... Customer: "I need to buy an AGP port. Do you guys sell them?" Me: "Uhh, actually they come as part of your motherboard." Customer: "So you don't sell them seperately." (edge in his voice now) Me: "They have to be on your motherboard. It has to do with the bus speed, and how it transmits data, you're not going to find it externally. It has to be on your motherboard." Customer: "Well, I'm going to go get someone to put one on my motherboard. I'll find someone who knows how to do it (now he sounds pissed for some reason) Me: Mocking laughter

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15-April-04, 07:33 PM		#2 (permalink)
DuplexEmotions Bi P-Hoe-lar	Ha! Worst I had was a woman asking me how fast the lone monitor sitting on the desk was. Me: "That's a monitor. I can hook up a computer to it, though, and you can see how fast it is." Her: "Okay!" She ended up buying the thing.

15-April-04, 07:37 PM		#3 (permalink)
j-dogg Mystical Schwinn Guru	How about the guy in Circuit City who told me Kingston HyperX isn't compatible with the Duron processor

15-April-04, 07:38 PM		#4 (permalink)
ion Apex Techie II	I worked on a womans PC who had the thing plugged into 5 surge supressors, sequentially. I didn't ask why though.

15-April-04, 07:38 PM		#5 (permalink)
DuplexEmotions Bi P-Hoe-lar	I once spent close to an hour trying to explain to somebody that the old GeoBook running GeOS is not running Windows 98.

15-April-04, 07:56 PM		#6 (permalink)
Lunamods Apex Tech Maniac Supreme	I always used to get people that when you ask what the specs of their machine are they would say, "Its a Windows 98 computer",then you ask em what proc/speed, "It a Windows 98" then you ask em how much memory, "Its a 20giga bytes memory". Then they want to trade it in for a "Windows XP computer" cause they heard they were faster,then you tell em what you can build them a new system for including 256 mega bytes of memory,have to say memory not RAM, and they say "Forget that, my Windows 98 computer has 20 Gigabytes,come on honey lets go to the other place their way over priced here"

15-April-04, 07:56 PM		#7 (permalink)
Highperf15 a.k.a., Frank Bullitt	I hope those people have other attrubutes going for them........if not...... "QUIT USING UP EVERYBODY ELSES OXYGEN!!!!!!!"

15-April-04, 08:01 PM		#8 (permalink)
BigAkita n00b-ass reviewer	Had a lady who's monitor died. I found a good one for a cheap price. When it came in she asked if it already had all the little pictures loaded in it.

15-April-04, 08:09 PM		#9 (permalink)
DuplexEmotions Bi P-Hoe-lar	I always thought it was funny when the customers tested how fast a computer was by waving the mouse on the desktop, then went 'yeah, it's good'

15-April-04, 08:09 PM		#11 (permalink)
TekXoID Banned	lmao, if you think that's bad... I need to get a CPU for my son, what colors do you carry? Do you mean the actual case? Yes, the CPU Erm...We carry the Antec and Lian-Li's on show up front. I said the CPU not the hard drive. I think you mean the computer enclosure, which do you like? How long have you worked here? I founded this store Mam, if you do not trust my expertise you can go elsewhere for your computer needs. murmur I knew HP was better than these local idiots. Get out.

15-April-04, 08:15 PM		#12 (permalink)
Gamma_Goblin Senor Cisner-Hoes	wow, pictures in the monitor and multi colored CPUs.... I don't think I've ever dealed with that bad of idiots! I guess it is a good thing I don't have a retail store for the customers would be beat for their stupidity

15-April-04, 08:42 PM		#15 (permalink)
davidkruta Apex Master Tech	school principal's letter: It has come to our attention that 2 blue hard drives were taken recently. [insert bearacratic bs here] go to check hard drives, theyre all there (lacie externals) umm, all the hard drives are here. principal: points over where 2 entire computers used to sit "those 2 hard drives are gone" me: you mean computers right? principal: no the hard drives, someone just threw them in their bag and took them. me: shakes head

15-April-04, 08:50 PM		#16 (permalink)
Spectrum Former GameApex Editor	i build a nice old a lady a computer, and she put the mouse on the monitor to move it around. i also remember i was putting groceries in a ladies car and saw an emachines. i asked her about it and she said she was getting emails about penis enlargment, and she had the hard drive replaced and 128mb of "memory" added, but they kept coming, so she bought a new computer. wtf?

15-April-04, 08:54 PM		#17 (permalink)
godfoot A George Orwell fan...sorta	I can already envision the tech support stories coming here....PJ....DS....??

15-April-04, 08:55 PM		#19 (permalink)
DuplexEmotions Bi P-Hoe-lar	someone brought in a 400mhz computer with Windows XP on it with all the 'fixins' turned on. They were wondering why it was so slow.

15-April-04, 08:59 PM		#20 (permalink)
davidkruta Apex Master Tech	haha wow some of these stories are outrageous. its like prank calling dell saying that youre cup holder is broken, but these people are serious.