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Darksamurai · 28-July-07, 10:12 PM

Well gang... I'm in my first class on management. Still... from watching my employers through the years, here's what I have to add...

TOP TEN: TIPS FOR MANAGERS:

1. Be aloof. If someone needs help, turn them over to a supervisor... if the supervisor doesn't know, give a DAMN vague answer. Anything you can't be blamed for is helpful!

2. Be insightful. If someone asks you a question about why you've done something, reflect on it for a long time... then blame someone else.

3. Remember, if a person is doing work, they're doing it WRONG!

4. Never stand behind an employee who gets in trouble with a client. It's ALWAYS the employees fault, and your bonus for keeping clients will confirm it.

5. Never pass along information. You'll just get blamed for it either way.

6. If an issue comes up, discuss anything else!

7. Acting like a spoiled four year old is acceptable in some situations... usually with people who don't work directly for you, but have to report to you anyway.

8. NEVER return calls! You can't be blamed for not getting a call right away. You're a manager and you're busy!

9. Upper management is solely there to inspire fear and create a need for paperwork for anyone under them. Remember this!

10. If you get caught as the screw up you are, never apologize. It's better to leave a company saying, "We didn't seem to have the same goals" than "Yes, I admit it... I'm a screw-up!"

NOTE: Yes... I do have someone in mind... several someones actually... not that I'm bitter.

28-July-07, 10:12 PM	#1 (permalink)
Darksamurai Sam-Hoe-rai N-Hoe-mad Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Helena, MT Posts: 5,977	DarkSamurai's School of Management Well gang... I'm in my first class on management. Still... from watching my employers through the years, here's what I have to add... TOP TEN: TIPS FOR MANAGERS: 1. Be aloof. If someone needs help, turn them over to a supervisor... if the supervisor doesn't know, give a DAMN vague answer. Anything you can't be blamed for is helpful! 2. Be insightful. If someone asks you a question about why you've done something, reflect on it for a long time... then blame someone else. 3. Remember, if a person is doing work, they're doing it WRONG! 4. Never stand behind an employee who gets in trouble with a client. It's ALWAYS the employees fault, and your bonus for keeping clients will confirm it. 5. Never pass along information. You'll just get blamed for it either way. 6. If an issue comes up, discuss anything else! 7. Acting like a spoiled four year old is acceptable in some situations... usually with people who don't work directly for you, but have to report to you anyway. 8. NEVER return calls! You can't be blamed for not getting a call right away. You're a manager and you're busy! 9. Upper management is solely there to inspire fear and create a need for paperwork for anyone under them. Remember this! 10. If you get caught as the screw up you are, never apologize. It's better to leave a company saying, "We didn't seem to have the same goals" than "Yes, I admit it... I'm a screw-up!" NOTE: Yes... I do have someone in mind... several someones actually... not that I'm bitter. __________________ “A good traveler has no fixed plans and is not intent on arriving.” - Lao Tzu